The following pick-up lines will not get you a date/get you laid no matter how amazing the delivery may be:
#1. Boy: So, you went to the doctor today? Everything okay?
Me: Oh yeah...everything's fine.
Boy: One of those take a pill for a couple of weeks and everything will clear up just fine? Huh? Huh? (then he chuckles at his own cleverness).
#2. Boy: (whispers very seductively while walking past me on the street) Go Bears.
Both happened. Recently. The second one took place while walking across Diversey. I should also note that not only was the line whispered "seductively" into my ear, but he attempted a little sigh that I think was supposed to be sexy. Key word: supposed to be.
If you respect yourself and your mother, please don't try these at home. If you don't respect yourself or your mother, please don't come near me.
That is all.
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2 comments:
Hey, I may actually be in Chicago soon, so how about a follow up post on what lines might work :)
Anyway, excited that I finally took the time to sign up so that I can comment. I wonder if you even read these...
How about "Nice shoes, wanna f#$*?"
Will that get me in your pants?
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